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Hash It Out · Track 10 of 20
PICERL or Ya Die
Jarrett Heintz · 3:02 · Released 28 September 2025
- Incident Response
- Incident response
- Hash It Out — the album
- Everything, A to Z
- Incident Block
Lyrics
- “Breaker, breaker—Mary Sue at Small-Town Systems. Red alert, zero budget.
- Fonda, you out there? We gotta PICK-ERL this mess or kiss the data goodbye…”
- Mary Sue begged for patches; the board just rolled their eyes.
- Old boxes hummin’, backups none, hope on the cheapest drives.
- She kept a coffee-stained runbook hidden in her drawer nearby—
- Preparation whispered courage when the dollars ran dry.
- P-I-C-E-R-L — PICK-ERL or ya die!
- Friday night, alarms ignite, the switches start to crawl;
- Ransom notes on dusty screens, printers screaming down the hall.
- Packet traces light the trail; the worm can’t hide its lie—
- I-Den-tea-fee-ca-tion nails the culprit on the fly.
- P-I-C-E-R-L — PICK-ERL or ya die!
- Phones are dead, bosses fled, budgets can’t be found;
- But friendship’s cheaper ammo—Fonda’s burning rubber into town.
- PICK-ERL or ya die.
- Na na na na na.
- PICK-UURRRLLLL!
- Fonda yanks the gateway cable, dead-man kills the LAN;
- Isolation in a broom-closet SOCK, laptops form the plan.
- Registry scrubbed, shadow-hive torched, watch the bad bits fry—
- Cun-tain-mint, Eee-rad-ee-keh-shun under neon exit signs.
- P-I-C-E-R-L — PICK-ERL or ya die!
- Snapshots spin like vinyl, restores begin to glow;
- From dusty drives to cloud archives, uptime starts to flow.
- Ree-cuv-err-ree hums a power chord beneath the server lights;
- Mary grins—first all-green dashboard in a hundred sleepless nights.
- PICK-ERL or ya die.
- Na na na na na.
- PICK-UURRRLLLL!
- Post-mortem scribbles on the wall, the budget finally turns—
- LESSONS LEARNED carved in stone so this bug never returns!
- “Spell it loud, spell it proud: P-I-C-E-R-L… PICK-ERL OR YA DIE!”